Fashion firsts from an avowed non-fashion person

I was doing a Google image search the other night. Oddly enough, I was looking for an image of a pink feather, preferably one from a roseate spoonbill. Roseate spoonbills are my favorite local wading bird you see.

In my search results, I came across this photograph of Demi Moore from a fashion spread she did for Harper's Bazaar last spring. Something looked oddly familiar.

What looked so familiar was the dress she's wearing. Why it looked familiar was made blindingly apparent when I read who the designer was. Fashionistas out there don't need the reminder but for the rest of us, that dress was designed by Jason Wu.

Well, I was there when the dress made its debut at Fashion Week in the fall of '09. Many, endless thanks to Brizo for seating me prominently enough to take this bad photo of it as it marched down a runway for the first time ever.

My head still spins when I think about it. Me? At Fashion Week? And not just once, but twice. This blog has changed my life on a very fundamental level and I stammer when I try to express my gratitude. Never in a million years could I have predicted any of this two and-a-half years ago when I didn't know what a blog was.

Thank you Charlie Kondek from Manning, Selvage and Lee and just as many thanks to Jai Massela and the rest of the gang at Brizo.

That was the end of the reruns

I'll be back with fresh, compelling new content bright and early tomorrow morning. In the meantime, don't forget to watch the season premiere of Mad Men tonight. Woo-hoo!

Get the ax murderer look for less

So last week I found this shower fixture from Bagno Sasso. Hilarity ensued. Here's the link to the story. We'll wait while you go read it because today's post will lean on it heavily.

OK, everybody back? Excellent, let's proceed.

Now, I spend a lot of time with my clients talking about how to recreate what they really want for a budget they can really afford. There's an art to finding a good knock off and a lot of times it can be useful to take a step back and think about what it is about the spendy original that's so appealing. A lot of times, it's not so much the object, it's the feeling it invokes. I find that selecting the right knock off is a matter of tuning into that feeling.

So if you have your heart set on that many thousand dollar man in the shower from Bagno Sasso, there's a $28 shower curtain from Urban Outfitters that brings up some of the feeling invoked by that original. Here it is.

Many thanks to the terrific Raina Cox, whose If The Lampshade Fits is a daily read. Make it one of yours too.

HGTV's Design Star spawns an uprising

The fifth season of HGTV's Design Star debuts on Sunday night. Yeah, I'll watch it. But it'll be the way somebody watches a train wreck. Here's the promo shot.

Guts? Glory? Glam? Come on, it's interior design; and hokey interior design at that. Can we please stop caging interior design in terms that conjure acts of bravery and daring-do?

Anyhow, Design Star has a panel of judges made up of HGTV's resident stars; Vern Yip, Genevieve Gorder and Candice Olson. They furrow their brows and act mean for the cameras as the contestants whip out poorly-executed rooms in a vain attempt to communicate their signature styles. Ugh.

I think the whole enterprise does a disservice to our honorable profession and the show would benefit from some levity. A whole lot of levity.

A couple of us were opining about the show on Twitter last night when @layersandlayers and @ZiaPriven and I came up with the idea to draft Joy and Janet, the Moggit Girls, to be judges on Design Star.

Any why not? They are already HGTV stars in their own right and they would counteract the sitting judges' mean-ness perfectly.

The future of humanity itself hangs in the balance here if I can borrow some of HGTV's heroism talk. If you're a Twitterer, join our movement. The Moggit Girls tweet as @moggitgirls and when you tweet your demands that they be cast to sit in the throne of judgment, use the hashtag #judgemoggits. If anybody has a better idea for a hashtag, let me know.

C'mon kids, let's start an HGTV uprising, a revolution. To the barricades!

I got moxie

You bet I have moxie, Building Moxie that is. The great JB Bartkowiak's reborn blog featured one of my screeds this morning. It's a rehash of something that appeared here previously but it poses a question that can never be posed often enough.

Check out my post and the rest of JB's posts at Building Moxie.

Buon compleanno a me

It's my birthday today. I'm 45 and that sounds weird to me. I certainly don't feel 45 although I suppose that how I feel right now is how 45 feels. It a curious thing to realize that I'm more than half way through and I have to say that where I am and what my life looks like at 45 bears scant resemblance to where I imagined it would be 10, 20, or 30 years ago. Ask me how thrilled I am that none of those old imaginings came true. I'll take things as they are right now any day.

The word for birthday in Italian, cumpleanno comes from the verb compiere. Compiere looks like but doesn't always mean to complete. In the sense that it's used in relation to birthdays, compiere means to fulfill. So my opening sentence, It's my birthday today would read Oggi compio gli anni in Italian and it would translate as Today, I fulfill my years.

I like to think of birthdays as fulfillments rather than as completions. Birthdays in English mark off time served. In Italian, birthdays commemorate a fulfilled life. It may be a semantics game but it helps me avoid dreading getting older. Thinking of my birthdays as fulfilled years rather than completed ones helps me concentrate on what a great, fantastic ride this is. When I think like this, it's easier to be grateful and stay grateful for the amazing people who begat me, the amazing people who surround me and the amazing people I have yet to meet.

So on that note, I am on my way out of town for the rest of the week as of this afternoon. I wrote a bunch of posts for the coming days that showcase my first foray back into the ad game in more than 15 years. I hope it's not too tedious, but I needed to do it as a credibility-building exercise. Bear with me and have a great rest of th week!

Stacation for a day

I live on the north side of downtown St. Petersburg and about three miles north east of where I'm sitting is a little sliver of wilderness called Weedon Island State Preserve. Here it is from the air.

Weedon Island is a pristine slice of old Florida and the preserve itself starts out in the turtle grass beds of the Bay. It includes a healthy stand of mangroves and continues inland through pine scrubland, grassy savanna and hardwood hammock. What this means is that you get a good view of an entire coastal ecosystem and the creatures of Weedon Island have enough room to be themselves.

Weedon Island has been a beacon to human beings for thousands of years and the evidence of those early habitations keep a team of archeologists working overtime. The earliest inhabitants of Weedon Island lived and fished there from 500 BCE onward. Conquistadors came through Weedon Island when this was an outpost of Spain and it was actually Ponce de Leon who mapped Tampa Bay. Pirates are said to have buried treasure there and in the early part of the 20th century, some dreamer started a movie studio there in the hopes of luring the fledgling film industry away from New York. That industry ended up in some town, I can never remember the name of it, in California instead.

Weedon's hardly untouched by human hands but in an area as built up as this is, it's a very welcome respite as well as yet another reminded how tied to the Gulf of Mexico everything around here is.

Well as luck would have it, my great pal Melody McFarland and her husband Gene are in town this weekend and we're going on an adventure tomorrow morning. Melody's a biologist who's never kayaked through a mangrove swamp before. I cannot wait to count birds, bugs, fish, snakes and mammals (marine and otherwise) with her. Besides, I need a break so badly I can't stand it.

Canoe trail through the mangroves

Cownose rays schooling around a mangrove island.

Atlantic bottlenose dolphins in the Bay. Yes, they really do jump out of the water like this.

No trip to the Florida wilds would be complete with a sighting or two of Nephila clavipes, the yellow silk spider. Truly my favorite Florida creature and that scale is not a Photoshop trick.

If I had to pick a favorite bird, the roseate spoonbill would come close to the top of my list. Few things in life prepare you for the thrill of seeing a pink bird.

More canoe trail scenery

Tampa Bay is one of the few places in North America with a breeding population of white pelicans. If we're lucky we'll see them.

Yellow-crested night herons are pretty common in these parts but they are still captivating.

Snowy egrets are pretty common too, but they're in breeding plumage at this time of year and they look otherworldly when they're tricked out in it.

And no trip into the Florida wilds is complete without running into a couple of these guys. Despite their endangered status, there's quite a population of these guys in Tampa Bay.

I love things biological almost as much as I like design-y stuff and I am a fortunate man indeed to have such good friends as Melody and Gene.

Do Blogland Zombies raise urban chickens?

It's at once a simple quandary and at the same time a question for the ages. Do Blogland Zombies (here and here)  raise urban chickens (here, here and here)?

And if they did, would it look like this?

Credit for this post goes to reader Cham, who continues to egg me on.

The American Gothic house is now on Google Earth

How cool is this? My American Gothic House is now on Google Earth and Google's 3-D Warehouse. Google Earth models are unattributed and this is about the coolest unattributed use of my work ever.






Thanks to you Mike at Igloo Studios, Mark at Kraftmaid and Chris from Google. That the American Gothic house is on Google Earth now proves the whole point of my KBIS presentation. Namely, that Google's SketchUp isn't locked behind a proprietary wall, it's integrated with the rest of the world. The world is changing Kitchen and Bath Industry, and embracing those changes is the surest way to guarantee a place for all of us.

Touched by an angel. Named Decorno.

I feel like I've been touched by an angel. While I was out of town, Decorno herself left a comment after my post She's Gone. Considering that she's retired from her role as the good witch of Bloglandia, this is either a visit from beyond the grave or a heavenly visitation. I'll chose the latter for now.

Aw, thank you, Paul. You were always a big supporter, and I really do appreciate it.

Again, thanks for the yucks and the inspiration Elaine.

Decorno

Thank you Making it Lovely and her lovely reader Lindsay

Yesterday, the design blog Making it Lovely ran a story about urban chickenkeeping. She took the opposite tack I did when I wrote the definitive blog post on the subject last month.

Anyhow, in the middle of the doe-eyed do-gooding going on in her comments section. Seriously, I don't think the word "cute" has had that kind of a workout since this nightmare debuted. Go ahead, click that link. I dare you.

Where was I? Oh yeah, in the middle of all that squealing and swooning, a reader named Lindsay linked to my definitive blogpost on urban chickenry. It did no good because the swoons and squeals continued unabated. However, what it did do was make my traffic go off the charts. I love it when that happens. I had no idea that Making it Lovely (a perfectly wonderful and worthwhile blog even if we don't see eye to eye on this chicken thing) pulled those kind of numbers. Brava! So thanks for letting me bask in your glow for a few hours and welcome everybody who's clicking through here. You'll find no cute or mindless pablum. What you will find however, are the coolest commenters on the internet. Stick around.

Oh and Lindsay is none other than Lindsay Christiansen, whose Likely Design holds one of the most attractive Wordpress themes I've ever seen. Lindsay's a designer/ blogger who does virtual design and she deserves a round of applause.

Attack of the Blogland Zombies: Chapter One

Before I left for Chicago, this site was abuzz with a discussion of Nick Olsen's very shiny apartment that had recently graced the pages of Lonny. The whole post was prompted by someone referring to me as a Blogland Zombie for hating on Nick's apartment. I love the moniker and apparently a bunch of other people did too. Julie Warner, the First Lady of appliances in Minneapolis, wondered what an attack of the Blogland Zombies might look like. The last comment posted to that original post painted just that picture.

Bravewolf, a commenter's commenter, penned a story so fantastic it deserves a post of its very own. Without further ado, I bring you Bravewolf's Attack of the Blogland Zombies.

The middle-aged woman swirled up to the man in a flurry of black lace and garters.

"And what would Sir be interested in tonight? I think that Sir is new to our establishment?"

"Yes, uh, what I mean is that I've never... Mother, you know, would not have approved, but the guys at work, well they've all been here and they said that I should, well, that it was a very fine, uh, establishment here and I, uh..."

"I see, Sir," said the woman briskly. "I know just who would be the best choice for Sir, if Sir would be good enough to indicate which gender he is primarily interested in tonight."

"Oh, uh, girls."

"Very good; I will send Penelope down."

"Uh, thank you very much."

The man sat gingerly against the leopard print pillows and tried to ignore the faceless silhouette paintings on the walls. It was very obviously the kind of establishment that Mother would never have approved of. He could still hear her voice.

"Glossy red paint is the sign of the devil, Matthew, and don't you forget it! Remember that Susan Mae? Her mother told me that not three months after she painted her room a glossy red with white accents, she ran off with that Baker boy, got herself pregnant and he had to marry her! You stay away from that kind of interior decorator, you hear me?"

He stood up suddenly, nearly catching the rough rope of the silver tray on the coffee table and sending the whole tea service on the floor. The round mirror mocked his efforts at calm, showing him a sweaty red face in a rumpled shirt.

"Mister Smith?"

"Yes!" he blurted, whirling around and beholding a beautiful woman clad only in a silk negligee. As she walked towards him, he noticed an unpleasant smell and looked closer. Her skin was grey. Her eyes were dead. She was a zombie. Behind her came Madam's pleasant inquiry, "Is Sir pleased with Penelope?"

"No! I mean yes! I mean, I think Mother needs me to pick up milk!" he babbled as he tripped over a white urn-like pottery jar in his blind quest to find the door and keep track of Penelope's advance, the sexy wiggle turning into a careless staggering shamble as her mouth opened and a low moan escaped her.

The front door wouldn't open. He had opened it himself, not twenty minutes ago. The red walls now seemed like they were melting, running into patches of blue and white and surrounding him with their low-VOC stickiness.

All pretense laid aside, Penelope bared her teeth as her stagger became more violent and she leaped towards his throat. He screamed in desperation and despair as her onslaught burst past his terrified hands and her teeth snapped shut on his-

"Mr. Smith! Mr. Smith! Wake up!"

"No! Mother, I didn't mean to-" he flailed for a moment, still seeing the blackened teeth en route to his jugular.

"Calm down, Mr. Smith. Evidently the new anxiety medication didn't work for you. We're going to put you on your former medication until we can sort this out."

An American (Appliance Blogger) in Paris

Hi, I'm Julie Warner, author of Kitchen and Home Appliance Blog (creative title, eh?) for my family's appliance company, Warners' Stellian.

I strong-armed the keys to Paul's blog away from him before he left for the Kitchen & Bath Industry Show in Chicago. Thankfully, his readers have the best sense of humor of any of the design blogs I follow. So please, humor me as I -- an appliance blogger, not a designer -- attempt to fill his shoes.

I visited Europe for the first time for two weeks in late March, traveling to Portugal, France and Italy during my stay. Friends encouraged me to take pictures, but I'm not much of a chronicler; I don't even own a digital camera.

However, the Palace of Versailles blew me away enough with its scale and extravagance to make me turn on my cell phone and snap some (rare) pictures. They're not spectacular nor comprehensive, but anything that gets me to take a picture on vacation is worth highlighting.


I can't exactly remember which rooms are which -- there are so many -- but I believe this was either a king's bedroom or dressing room. There was so much to look at, from the artwork to the wallpaper, to the molding -- which was often gilded -- to the chandeliers to...


...the chairs. I took a picture of this chair because I could actually see it in a future house of my own. I think it's so beautiful.


This wallpaper is outrageous, in a good way, I think. If I commissioned paintings of myself, this is precisely how I'd display them -- marble and all.


No stone left unturned? More like no spot left bare. There are gold clocks on top of gold mirrors on hand-painted walls with intricate, gold-dipped moldings behind crystal chandeliers...


I covet the detail on the interior of this fireplace. Again, no space left undecorated.


OK, this couch simply reminded me of my mother, who collects antiques. I absolutely loved it.


At this point, my friends were judging me for getting excited about wallpaper and furniture. And we needed to leave.

Next stop? What a 180: Pompidou Centre, home to the National Museum of Modern Art -- and some pretty fantastic architecture.


I also snapped this picture with my phone. We're at the top level of the structure, after climbing many stories up the clear tube-encased escalator. It looks like it goes on forever, doesn't it?


This exhibit caught my eye, for obvious reasons, while visiting the female artist-focused exhibit, elles@centrepompidou. (Watch a clip of Martha Rosler's feminist video, Semiotics of the Kitchen.)


The kitchen has been historically decided to be "the woman's space." And despite the existence of female home designers, the exhibit said, "(translated by Google) Particularly in France, the access of women designers in the industry is still limited."

Thanks for letting me share my two favorite places I visited in France with you. I'd love to hear if you agree if people just see Versailles' decoration as gaudy or if they were inspired like I was. The Pompidou challenged my thinking -- always a good thing. But I'm not afraid to admit that some of the stuff in there was just plain WEIRD.

Optical illusion Wednesday

The ever brilliant Richard Wiseman strikes again. This is without a doubt the most persistent illusion I've ever seen. Click on the image and it will get larger.

My brain is so determined to see spirals that even when I trace what are clearly circles, I perceive a spiral. I don't know about you guys but I cannot force myself to see these circles. Man! These spirals that aren't spirals won't go away.

Human brains are pattern recognizing machines. I say that all the time. As such, the need to see a pattern can override reality without a whole lot of prodding. I'd love a real explanation of this particular illusion from a physiological perspective. Seriously. What structures in my brain are overriding what my eyes see? Wild stuff!

When hell froze over

In the wonders never cease department, Apartment Therapy's The Kitchn picked up my post about Richard Holschuh from Saturday. They got my name right, my URL right and most of all they got Richard a world of exposure I never could have on my own.

To make matters even better, the lead paragraph started with an Apartment Therapy royal we.

We're smitten with these concrete countertops from Richard Holschuh, an artist and artisan from Vermont. His company creates custom concrete countertops for kitchens, baths, and other areas, and some of them blow away our usual ideas of what a concrete surface can look like.

I guess the key to getting websites with traffic counts in the millions to notice me is to mock them endlessly.

Apartment Therapy's The Kitchn: Concrete With Soul

Hanging out with celebrities

I just found out that I'm on the guest list for a party in Chicago next month that's taking place during the Kitchen and Bath Industry Show. While I'm there, I'll be granted an audience with the man who brought the world a Barbie hair chandelier.

That's right, it's me and Jonathan Adler baby.

The only thing that could make it better would be if Maxwell  Gillingham-Ryan and Oliver Ryan, the founders of Apartment Therapy, were there too.

This comment made my day

Last April I wrote a reader question post, What is this and what do I do with it? In that piece. a hapless reader sent me this photo:

And he asked me to identify the style and make some suggestions about how to decorate a bedroom around it. I told him to get rid of it more or less.

Well, at 10:36am on 19 March, someone who goes by the name of other could be mom left the following comment after that old post.

At least that reader isn't stuck with the bed AND a house full of honey oak furniture, honey oak flooring, honey oak "paneling", honey oak picture frames, honey oak early american anything that isn't from his mother's which is all honey oak and honey oak mantle clock with eerily honey oak brass finished "decorative" trim involving a lot of craptastic netting and swirls...i hate my life.

Thank you other could be mom, please come back.

Ugh

If you can't see that tripe, it reads: With a butterfly kiss and a ladybug hug/ sleep tight little one like a bug in a rug.


A child who grows up surrounded by that kind of pablum will end up either a heroin addict or a compulsive hoarder.

Now back in my day we heard such gems as:

Ladybug, ladybug, fly away home
Your house is on fire, your children will burn.

Or how about:

Good night
sleep tight
don't let the bed bugs bite.

The veiled threats and frank admission that life sucked filled us with an anxiety that kept us on the straight and narrow. Maybe the fix for the current childhood obesity epidemic is the reintroduction of brutal children's rhymes. Grimm's Complete Fairy Tales for Everyone!

Let's start with The Mouse, the Bird and the Sausage.

When wall words say what they mean

The terrifically funny Alycia Wicker is an interior designer in Eastvale, CA and she writes the blog Casa Moxie. Casa Moxie is always brimming with great pointers and ideas and all of it's sprinkled liberally with Alycia's biting humor. I love it when she gets on a roll. She was on a roll earlier this week.

She has little patience for wall words and that's definitely something we have in common. I found this one on a website called Vinyl-Decals that sums up perfectly what I dislike wall words so much.

Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. I think what somebody who hangs that over her bed is really saying is something from Dante's Inferno. Like this:

Look it up!

Anyhow, Alycia took some liberties of her own yesterday and I thought they were hilarious. Here are some wall words from the mind of Alycia Wicker.

This is hilarious and it has me thinking of phrases I'd really like to see emblazoned on walls. So what bitingly funny words or phrases can you guys come up with? Who ever leaves the snarkiest quote today wins. Go!